I am listening to "Lord, I give you my heart" by: Reuben Morgan. I like his voice. I'm sitting at my desk in my office staring into space...I just finished reading Ephesians 1 & 2 and let me tell you, if you're feeling down - that is some good 'pick-me-up' right there. Grace is a gift from God. I heard a neat quote while on my journey in Spain...
"Grace is God giving you something you don't deserve. Mercy is God not giving you something you do deserve."
I am so thankful that His mercies are new every morning and his grace is sufficient for me. His grace covers all my mistakes, thoughts, actions all of the time.
Last night we had church and I walked in with a smile on my face but my Pastor knows me oh-so-well and he could see through the smile that I was hurting, broken and even a little grumpy, if you will. He said "you're grumpy." I reply with "Yes, sir." Clearly not interested in carrying on a conversation and he said "I'm here for you, Al. I'll help in anyway I can..." Then he just looks into the distance. I stood there staring at him wondering what was going to come next. (When he gets that look God is most likely telling him what my problem is, why it's there, what I need to do to fix it and why haven't I fixed it yet) He says "You feel like God put you up on the top shelf and forgot about you, don't you?" He walked away.
Me?
On a shelf?
The top shelf, nonetheless.
Forgot about me?
I do.
How did he know that?
Why did God tell him that.
Why does God always respond with a question?
Maybe if I starting stating things to Him, He will respond with a statement...just a thought.
Pastor totally nailed it. That's exactly how I feel. I feel as if I'm watching everything take place, out of my reach. I'm watching what I should really be involved with. I'm observing, not participating. My job is to participate. The Bible even says in Romans 15:1 "As for us who are strong, our duty is to bear with the weaknesses of those who are not strong, and not seek our own pleasure" and Ephesians 6:7 "With right good will, be faithful to your duty as service rendered to the Lord and not to man." I have a duty as a Christian to work and be diligent in my work for the Kingdom of God. So why then am I just watching everything? Why do I just go to work everyday, go to church, do my occasional leading songs, playing the piano, teaching Sunday School - you know? The norm.
Buuuuuut....
Psalm 27:14 says "Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD."
Aaaannnnddd..
Psalm 62:1 says "Truly my soul waiteth upon God: from him cometh my salvation." (Salvation meaning Yshuw'ah in Hebrew meaning Deliverance.)
There's more...
Isaiah 40:31 "But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."
One more...
Isaiah 64:4: "For since the beginning of the world men have not heard, nor perceived by the ear, neither hath the eye seen, O God, beside thee, what he hath prepared for him that waiteth for him."
So I wasn't put on the top shelf and forgotten about. I was put up there to wait on God. If I were to take it into my own hands - my life would be a disaster. But, I can wait on God and he can fulfill of my dreams. Not because I deserve it but back to that Grace & Mercy thing. Because he is God and because He loves me. All I have to do is wait on Him...
"Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances." -unknown
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